Dear Bruno Mars,
Why would you ever, EVER catch a grenade for someone? What would that accomplish? The grenade's gonna blow up anyways. And don't even get me started on why you'd throw your hand a blade for someone, or jump in front of a train for someone...seriously dude, if you like a girl, just buy her some nice jewelry or something. If she doesn't reciprocate your feelings, then find someone else. It shouldn't be that hard for you-I mean, you're a famous singer and stuff. You've probably got girls swooning over you everywhere you go, so I really don't see why it's necessary for you to go to such extreme measures to win someone's affection.
Love,
Kenz
P.S. I just did a google image search for you, and decided you're pretty cute. Want to grab coffee sometime? I promise I won't make you catch any grenades. I'm not like those other girls.
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