Dear Calories,
My high school health teacher told me that you're just another word for "energy", which we obviously need. Still, I have to question your significance in the health world sometimes. What I mean is, I feel like some people obsess over you when you're just, like, not that important, you know?
I'm not exactly a "health nut", but I did recently download an app to my iPhone called "My Fitness Pal", which basically calculates how many of you I consume and burn in a day (based on my food and exercise choices) and projects my potential weight loss (or gain, I suppose). According to today's entry, I could lose eight pounds in five weeks by eating a diet that included beer, pizza, and homemade cookies (and over an hour of Zumba toning, but still...).
Could I actually lose weight by sticking to this strict pizza-beer-cookie diet? Eh, maybe, provided I had time to work out for over an hour every day. Would I be taking significant steps towards improving my overall health? I wish, but I sort of doubt it.
I'm just saying, you're not as important as you think you are. Get over yourselves.
Love,
Kenz
Monday, February 10, 2014
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
I'll take your side; if I'm the only one, I'm used to that.
Dear Loyal Blog-readers,
I'm sorry that I haven't been posting as frequently as I had planned on in the new year. To be honest, I haven't been in a very comical mood as of lately...but that's not your fault, beautiful fans.
You've probably heard this often misattributed quote: "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle". I was reminded of this a few days ago, when one of my students walked into class looking a bit down. "Everything okay, (student's name)?" I said, to which she replied "I'm just not in a very good mood today...". At first I thought "oh please, your little seventh-grader problems ain't got nothing on my quarter-life crisis!" but then I reminded myself that I have absolutely no right to judge this girl, since I don't know her battles.
If you're reading this, chances are you're fighting your own battle. I truly wish there was something I could do to make your battle easier, but I will tell you this: whatever your battle may be, both time and love will make it easier. Be strong, but let yourself be sad when you need to be. Remind yourself that this too shall pass. Don't be afraid to reach out to those around you; regardless of how petty you think your battle is, know that there are people who love you and who will be there for you, whatever that entails. And hey, if you're one of my loyal blog-readers, that includes me. No foolin'.
Love,
Kenz
I'm sorry that I haven't been posting as frequently as I had planned on in the new year. To be honest, I haven't been in a very comical mood as of lately...but that's not your fault, beautiful fans.
You've probably heard this often misattributed quote: "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle". I was reminded of this a few days ago, when one of my students walked into class looking a bit down. "Everything okay, (student's name)?" I said, to which she replied "I'm just not in a very good mood today...". At first I thought "oh please, your little seventh-grader problems ain't got nothing on my quarter-life crisis!" but then I reminded myself that I have absolutely no right to judge this girl, since I don't know her battles.
If you're reading this, chances are you're fighting your own battle. I truly wish there was something I could do to make your battle easier, but I will tell you this: whatever your battle may be, both time and love will make it easier. Be strong, but let yourself be sad when you need to be. Remind yourself that this too shall pass. Don't be afraid to reach out to those around you; regardless of how petty you think your battle is, know that there are people who love you and who will be there for you, whatever that entails. And hey, if you're one of my loyal blog-readers, that includes me. No foolin'.
Love,
Kenz
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
The girls with the bodies like boys with ferraris.
Dear Double Standards,
You're stupid and outdated. That's all I have to say to you. You can go away now. No, really.
Love,
Kenz
You're stupid and outdated. That's all I have to say to you. You can go away now. No, really.
Love,
Kenz
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Sock it to me.
Dear Self-Respect,
You're pretty great and stuff, but I feel like some people just don't get you. Merriam-Webster defines you as "proper respect for yourself as a human being", which would lead one to believe that you are concerned solely with the individual person...in other words, my self-respect is about my opinion of me, not someone else's opinion of me. Same goes for anyone else who has you (and goodness knows, everyone should!)
That being said, I don't understand why so many people feel the need to question others' self-respect. One of the most common instances I can cite is that of a woman criticizing another woman's choice of clothing, actions, etc. by saying that this woman "must have no self-respect". Am I the only one who finds this kind of silly? Clearly the first woman in this scenario has little or no respect for the woman that she is condemning, but what exactly led her to assume that this other woman (who the first woman probably doesn't even know very well, if at all) must lack the proper respect of herself as a human being?
Simply put, a person's self-respect is relative to how that person feels about themselves; it has nothing to do with how outsiders judge them based on the way they dress, act, speak, or dance (yes, I'm talking to you, Jae Tracie!).
You keep doing you, Self-Respect, and I'll always respect you for it!
Love,
Kenz
You're pretty great and stuff, but I feel like some people just don't get you. Merriam-Webster defines you as "proper respect for yourself as a human being", which would lead one to believe that you are concerned solely with the individual person...in other words, my self-respect is about my opinion of me, not someone else's opinion of me. Same goes for anyone else who has you (and goodness knows, everyone should!)
That being said, I don't understand why so many people feel the need to question others' self-respect. One of the most common instances I can cite is that of a woman criticizing another woman's choice of clothing, actions, etc. by saying that this woman "must have no self-respect". Am I the only one who finds this kind of silly? Clearly the first woman in this scenario has little or no respect for the woman that she is condemning, but what exactly led her to assume that this other woman (who the first woman probably doesn't even know very well, if at all) must lack the proper respect of herself as a human being?
Simply put, a person's self-respect is relative to how that person feels about themselves; it has nothing to do with how outsiders judge them based on the way they dress, act, speak, or dance (yes, I'm talking to you, Jae Tracie!).
You keep doing you, Self-Respect, and I'll always respect you for it!
Love,
Kenz
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
In this jungle you can't run.
Dear Bruno Mars (part deux...check out part un here),
Yeah, I've got another bone to pick with you. What genius told you that women like being compared to gorillas? Probably the same genius who told you to impress the ladies by catching grenades for them.
Clearly you didn't read my last post, although it does kinda seem like you're taking your ladying tips from women's magazines. Women have body issues, okay? Likening a woman to a large, hairy, smelly animal (no offense, gorillas) will NOT make her feel sexy.
Love,
Kenz
Yeah, I've got another bone to pick with you. What genius told you that women like being compared to gorillas? Probably the same genius who told you to impress the ladies by catching grenades for them.
Clearly you didn't read my last post, although it does kinda seem like you're taking your ladying tips from women's magazines. Women have body issues, okay? Likening a woman to a large, hairy, smelly animal (no offense, gorillas) will NOT make her feel sexy.
Love,
Kenz
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
So Cosmo says you're fat? Well I ain't down with that!
Dear Women's Magazines,
Yeah, I read you sometimes. Usually, it's when I'm waiting in the doctor's office and I don't have my phone, or anything else to keep me occupied, with me. I've observed a wide variety of ludicrous headlines on your covers over the years, but one thing never seems to change: without a doubt, every women's magazine has at least one headlining article about weight loss.
"Shape-Up Shortcuts: 14 Tricks to Melt Fat"
"Shrink Your Inner Thighs in Six Minutes a Day!"
"Kate Middleton's Post-Baby Weight Loss Regime...Your Exclusive Duchess Diet and Shape-up Plan"
...this may be way too obvious to point out, but if each of these diet and exercise regimes were as effective as they claim to be, why would the reader need a new one every month?
Anywhoozle, my main quibble with this marketing practice is your reaffirmation of a woman's constant need to be striving for a slimmer, smaller, fitter figure. Every day, women across the nation are told by the media that they should never be satisfied with what they see in the mirror. After all, if a women were ever to (gasp) accept and love her body for what it is, how would you ever sell any magazines?
Here's the thing: as a woman in her early twenties, I am fully aware that I am not a twig. I am also fully aware that even an endless amount of the workouts that you publish monthly will probably never turn me into a twig. But despite all of this, I really like my body. Please stop telling me that I shouldn't; that's really not cool of you.
Love,
Kenz
Yeah, I read you sometimes. Usually, it's when I'm waiting in the doctor's office and I don't have my phone, or anything else to keep me occupied, with me. I've observed a wide variety of ludicrous headlines on your covers over the years, but one thing never seems to change: without a doubt, every women's magazine has at least one headlining article about weight loss.
"Shape-Up Shortcuts: 14 Tricks to Melt Fat"
"Shrink Your Inner Thighs in Six Minutes a Day!"
"Kate Middleton's Post-Baby Weight Loss Regime...Your Exclusive Duchess Diet and Shape-up Plan"
...this may be way too obvious to point out, but if each of these diet and exercise regimes were as effective as they claim to be, why would the reader need a new one every month?
Anywhoozle, my main quibble with this marketing practice is your reaffirmation of a woman's constant need to be striving for a slimmer, smaller, fitter figure. Every day, women across the nation are told by the media that they should never be satisfied with what they see in the mirror. After all, if a women were ever to (gasp) accept and love her body for what it is, how would you ever sell any magazines?
Here's the thing: as a woman in her early twenties, I am fully aware that I am not a twig. I am also fully aware that even an endless amount of the workouts that you publish monthly will probably never turn me into a twig. But despite all of this, I really like my body. Please stop telling me that I shouldn't; that's really not cool of you.
Love,
Kenz
Monday, September 9, 2013
For love is strong as death.
Dear Mr. Horyn,
I don't even know where to begin. It's been a while since we've talked in person, and I regret that so much now. I know I'm not the only one of your former students who wishes I could have just one more class with you.
Confession time: my senior year, I signed up for Creative Writing because I figured it was an easy, joke of a class (although I was elated when I found out that you were teaching it, because I had heard so many wonderful things about you!); while that class with you was anything but a "joke", you had us all roaring with carefree, comfortable laughter every session. You just had a way of bringing out the best in your students, especially when it came to writing. I remember rediscovering my love of writing in that class, after spending years stuck in a five-paragraph-claim-evidence-warrant rut. You made me believe that I was a good writer, and as cliche as it sounds, it's nice to feel like you're good at something that you enjoy doing. I also loved your messages of "rebellion", and while I never took GAW, I absolutely loved participating in many of my friends rebellion projects. Seriously, that project is exactly what my generation needed.
I remember at the end of the semester, when I was getting ready to graduate, you encouraged me to continue writing creatively after high school. Well, my desire to write outside of classwork is what eventually led to this blog, so I have you to thank for all of this.
Why someone as spirited and full of life as you should die at such a young age is beyond us all, but I hope it brings you joy to look down and see all of the lives you've changed for the better. So for you, Mr. Horyn, and for so many others who have lost their lives due to this ugly disease, I promise to fight for the extinction of cancer, and to never, not even for a second, conform.
Love,
Kenz
I don't even know where to begin. It's been a while since we've talked in person, and I regret that so much now. I know I'm not the only one of your former students who wishes I could have just one more class with you.
Confession time: my senior year, I signed up for Creative Writing because I figured it was an easy, joke of a class (although I was elated when I found out that you were teaching it, because I had heard so many wonderful things about you!); while that class with you was anything but a "joke", you had us all roaring with carefree, comfortable laughter every session. You just had a way of bringing out the best in your students, especially when it came to writing. I remember rediscovering my love of writing in that class, after spending years stuck in a five-paragraph-claim-evidence-warrant rut. You made me believe that I was a good writer, and as cliche as it sounds, it's nice to feel like you're good at something that you enjoy doing. I also loved your messages of "rebellion", and while I never took GAW, I absolutely loved participating in many of my friends rebellion projects. Seriously, that project is exactly what my generation needed.
I remember at the end of the semester, when I was getting ready to graduate, you encouraged me to continue writing creatively after high school. Well, my desire to write outside of classwork is what eventually led to this blog, so I have you to thank for all of this.
Why someone as spirited and full of life as you should die at such a young age is beyond us all, but I hope it brings you joy to look down and see all of the lives you've changed for the better. So for you, Mr. Horyn, and for so many others who have lost their lives due to this ugly disease, I promise to fight for the extinction of cancer, and to never, not even for a second, conform.
Love,
Kenz
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